Ok, this I submitted to a bulletin board, but ya know, I like to be efficient and recycle.
You all read the story recently, someone invited me for Shabbos on the pretense of wanting to host someone who is alone on Shabbos. I think before he even made kiddush he started in... he felt I should move to Passaic (mind you, I'm modern and attend a CUNY) I said, "I can't move. I'm in college." He actually said maybe a volunteer organization would pack my stuff for me. He also said, "college is cheaper in Jersey." Ummm, out of state tuition cheaper than in-state tuition? Well, I didn't know the guy and he just had an answer for everything. He even said I should go get new pictures for Frumster. Yeah... my pictures are professional headshots that go for $250/$300, I know no one is paying that just for pics on Frumster.
MAN OH MAN am I sick of people feeling entitled to judge me based on my status of single. Maybe the married folks married nebachs. I sure thought this guy was a neb but, I was raised to bite my tongue. Although, I spoke up and told him something like, well you only invited me to tell me to move to Passaic.
I told people were supposed to learn, "if you can't say something nice, don't say anything at all."
Please, please, please never go to Passaic. I lived there shortly after my conversion and it is one of the worse things I could have done. I know you're not gonna move there.... but I just had to say it.
ReplyDeleteSo here is what I would do:
ReplyDelete1) Always prepare a "rescue meal" at home, even when you are invited
2) If they start those kinds of attacks, you just say "thanks for having me" and you leave and go back to your own meal.
3) Birkat Hamazon is not a problem, you may interrupt your meal and finish it somewhere else.